So, basically today has been a total shit show, i've been yelled at by my mom all day, being called awful things and just being trash talked to all my fucking neighbours, then she said if she sees any MORSEL of food in my garbage can, she's kicking me out.
SHE LOOKED THROUGH MY FUCKING GARBAGE??? Like i don't understand why she would. and now i'm scared because i had 1 lollipop in there. ONE.
Would you like to know the consequence of this is??
wait for it..... She'll kick me out : ) so i'll pretty much have no choice but to live with my dad which brings up horrifying fucking childhood memories and i can't even BREATHE when i'm there let alone function.
honestly i'm so fucking tired of this bs, i just wanna leave and never come back. i'm so tired of the constant ridiculing i get for literally doing NOTHING, when my sister on the other hand, she can have the messiest fucking room in EXISTENCE. And she gets the "ugh just clean it up". yet when there's literal dust on my dresser i get the whole "you're gonna be out by next week" thing. I'm tired of living in fear. I just finished doing therapy also which probably was not a good idea but my therapist was like "HEY YOU'RE GOOD. TAKE ON THE WORLD. HERE'S A PAPER CLIP AND STRING". I haven't felt good in like, oh, i dunno, 4 fucking months since I've been done therapy.
I'm sorry for ranting all this out but honestly i just can't take it anymore and i want to literally just fucking leave. but i can't because my mother pretty much takes all my disability money. so that option's out of the question.
anyway. thanks for reading i guess. i'm very sorry for ranting again but i just really needed to get shit out.